My Cheeseman played in his first soccer game this weekend. He scored a GOALLLLLLL! If you click the link on his name, you can watch his score. He was so excited. It's all he talked about all weekend. He's a natural. He gets it from me!
Tuesday, February 27, 2007
Tuesday, February 20, 2007
And so it is done...
The bookseller era. I did it. Today. I called and told Tom that I'm through. I just can't take the hours anymore. And not seeing the boys for three straight days. And being bone tired every day of the week. Never being able to catch up on my sleep. Not grading papers for a week.
Well, that will probably still continue.
When I told Josh last night, the first thing he did was offer me more money to stay. But I think he realized it was hopeless when I told him that I could cut my hours in half and still make enough doing homebound. I did tell Tom to keep me on the books for the summer. I'd hate to never be able to come back.
I still feel like a little part of me is dead. I really loved working at that bookstore. I liked working with all those weird people. People who are smart and funny and not afraid to be different. It was such a melting pot. Do you know, in all the jobs I've had, all the places I've worked, I've never before worked in an environment where I truly liked all the people I've worked with. Just there.
I will truly miss being there. Thank you, bookstore. For everything.
Well, that will probably still continue.
When I told Josh last night, the first thing he did was offer me more money to stay. But I think he realized it was hopeless when I told him that I could cut my hours in half and still make enough doing homebound. I did tell Tom to keep me on the books for the summer. I'd hate to never be able to come back.
I still feel like a little part of me is dead. I really loved working at that bookstore. I liked working with all those weird people. People who are smart and funny and not afraid to be different. It was such a melting pot. Do you know, in all the jobs I've had, all the places I've worked, I've never before worked in an environment where I truly liked all the people I've worked with. Just there.
I will truly miss being there. Thank you, bookstore. For everything.
Friday, February 16, 2007
Ramblings of a Tired Mom
They don't tell you it's going to be like this. This constant frustration. The compelling need to hit someone, something. Like you're going to explode if you don't get it out. No one talks about this.
How sometimes, you just want to scream. Or run away. Somewhere the little demons can't find you. You get so fed up.
You lock yourself in your room with the lights off. You can hear them in the other room, playing. Hitting each other. You hear one scream, but then it stops. He's okay. You hear banging, but figure if they aren't screaming it's okay.
You just can't take it.
How long can I go on like this? Working three days a week after school until 10 pm. Then getting up at 5 am the next morning and teaching all day. Something's gotta give.
I've been looking at doing homebound instruction. You know, helping kids who can't - for whatever reason - make it to school each day. We are bound, by law, to provide services for them. It pays $20 an hour. Which is almost 3 times what I make at the bookstore. Which means I could do this 6 hours total a week and make what I'm working my ass off for now. It makes sense. Why would I not do this?
Because I love being at the store. I really like the people I'm working with. And I'm scared I won't know enough. What if I have to instruct some kid in Calculus? Chemistry? Physics? French? I don't know that stuff. I would be worthless. At the bookstore, I'm never worthless. I know most of the answers. I'm hot stuff there. I'm the one they turn to when they need their card percentages up. Stick me on a register and let me go.
Why can't I give it up?
And now I'm home. The demons are finally in bed. I'm drinking wine. It tastes good. I need to relax. I'd take a bath, but I'm afraid I'll fall asleep. Maybe I'll just read. From the large stack of books next to the bed. I do work at a bookstore you know.
How sometimes, you just want to scream. Or run away. Somewhere the little demons can't find you. You get so fed up.
You lock yourself in your room with the lights off. You can hear them in the other room, playing. Hitting each other. You hear one scream, but then it stops. He's okay. You hear banging, but figure if they aren't screaming it's okay.
You just can't take it.
How long can I go on like this? Working three days a week after school until 10 pm. Then getting up at 5 am the next morning and teaching all day. Something's gotta give.
I've been looking at doing homebound instruction. You know, helping kids who can't - for whatever reason - make it to school each day. We are bound, by law, to provide services for them. It pays $20 an hour. Which is almost 3 times what I make at the bookstore. Which means I could do this 6 hours total a week and make what I'm working my ass off for now. It makes sense. Why would I not do this?
Because I love being at the store. I really like the people I'm working with. And I'm scared I won't know enough. What if I have to instruct some kid in Calculus? Chemistry? Physics? French? I don't know that stuff. I would be worthless. At the bookstore, I'm never worthless. I know most of the answers. I'm hot stuff there. I'm the one they turn to when they need their card percentages up. Stick me on a register and let me go.
Why can't I give it up?
And now I'm home. The demons are finally in bed. I'm drinking wine. It tastes good. I need to relax. I'd take a bath, but I'm afraid I'll fall asleep. Maybe I'll just read. From the large stack of books next to the bed. I do work at a bookstore you know.
Sunday, January 28, 2007
Getting Ready for summer
Can you believe it? Only 15 more weeks until the end of school! Am I counting???
Anyway, my little bro is getting married this summer. And our WHOLE family is coming from Illinois for the wedding. And they want to stay for an extra week afterward at the beach so we can spend some quality time together. However, some people can only stay a few days. And some people say that all the houses we've found are too expensive. Do they not realize that the beach in SC is expensive in the summer? Oh man! We have been round and round about the cost. Really, I was thinking that $200 a person isn't too bad. For a week at Myrtle? That's nothing! And it was beachfront!
I don't know what to do. I don't want to be in charge of this project. Now they're saying they want to stay in Hilton Head. Um, hello! Way more expensive! Whatever. I'll just keep finding places. Even if it ends up just being me, sis, and Dad's families. NBD.
Anyway, my little bro is getting married this summer. And our WHOLE family is coming from Illinois for the wedding. And they want to stay for an extra week afterward at the beach so we can spend some quality time together. However, some people can only stay a few days. And some people say that all the houses we've found are too expensive. Do they not realize that the beach in SC is expensive in the summer? Oh man! We have been round and round about the cost. Really, I was thinking that $200 a person isn't too bad. For a week at Myrtle? That's nothing! And it was beachfront!
I don't know what to do. I don't want to be in charge of this project. Now they're saying they want to stay in Hilton Head. Um, hello! Way more expensive! Whatever. I'll just keep finding places. Even if it ends up just being me, sis, and Dad's families. NBD.
Saturday, January 20, 2007
I knew it all along...
| You scored as Sleeping Beauty. Your alter ego is Princess Aurora, a.k.a. Sleeping Beauty! You are beautiful and enchanting, and as sweet as ever.
Which Disney Character is your Alter Ego? created with QuizFarm.com |
Friday, January 05, 2007
No Good, Very Bad Day
I feel sick. This can't be happening.
I saw the story on the news this morning about a plane losing radar contact last night. It was foggy around the airport. The local boys were out looking for the plane, they thought it went down. They found it once the fog lifted, only a mile from the airport. It was on it's final descent toward the runway. And it crashed.
It happens all the time, plane crashes. But it doesn't always crash on my friends. Derek, my buddy, my pal. When I was pregnant with B, he would come up to me every Sunday and rub my belly. He gave the greatest hugs! He wasn't a big guy, just portly. But he would HUG you. And he had the softest leather jacket.
His wife, Lisa, is one of my best friends. We sing together in the Praise band at church. She just took over as the worship leader last week. She is so sweet and caring. She was one of the first people I told when I was pregnant with B. She'll watch my kids at the drop of a hat, and loves them like they were hers too.
Her kids are good buddies with my two. Henry and Cheeseman are in the same Sunday school class. They're only 9 months apart in age. Emma is such a sweetheart. She's almost 8 now, and such a girl. She's not real frilly, but she's so funny! I sat next to her at dinner a couple weeks ago, and she cracked me up!
I can't believe he's gone. How is it possible? How could God take that wonderful man from his family? I don't understand. He was the breadwinner, the spiritual head, the daddy. It just doesn't make sense.
I know he's with Jesus. Derek was such a strong Christian. He and Lisa started a non-profit last year to bring beautiful art to those least able to have it. He taught a pottery class up at the church. They taught Sunday school together! Maybe he was just so good, God needed him up there to show the rest of us the way.
I will miss Derek so much. If he can read this, I hope he knows that I love him and will never forget him.
I saw the story on the news this morning about a plane losing radar contact last night. It was foggy around the airport. The local boys were out looking for the plane, they thought it went down. They found it once the fog lifted, only a mile from the airport. It was on it's final descent toward the runway. And it crashed.
It happens all the time, plane crashes. But it doesn't always crash on my friends. Derek, my buddy, my pal. When I was pregnant with B, he would come up to me every Sunday and rub my belly. He gave the greatest hugs! He wasn't a big guy, just portly. But he would HUG you. And he had the softest leather jacket.
His wife, Lisa, is one of my best friends. We sing together in the Praise band at church. She just took over as the worship leader last week. She is so sweet and caring. She was one of the first people I told when I was pregnant with B. She'll watch my kids at the drop of a hat, and loves them like they were hers too.
Her kids are good buddies with my two. Henry and Cheeseman are in the same Sunday school class. They're only 9 months apart in age. Emma is such a sweetheart. She's almost 8 now, and such a girl. She's not real frilly, but she's so funny! I sat next to her at dinner a couple weeks ago, and she cracked me up!
I can't believe he's gone. How is it possible? How could God take that wonderful man from his family? I don't understand. He was the breadwinner, the spiritual head, the daddy. It just doesn't make sense.
I know he's with Jesus. Derek was such a strong Christian. He and Lisa started a non-profit last year to bring beautiful art to those least able to have it. He taught a pottery class up at the church. They taught Sunday school together! Maybe he was just so good, God needed him up there to show the rest of us the way.
I will miss Derek so much. If he can read this, I hope he knows that I love him and will never forget him.
Tuesday, December 19, 2006
Eye Candy, dammit
| Gummy Bears |
 You may be smooshie and taste unnatural, but you're so darn cute. |
Okay, I thought that since I have been eating so much candy today, I should find out what kind I am. Cute, huh? Smooshie and cute, all at the same time. No wonder my Hubs... um, I'll stop now.
Anyway, I am out of school for the holidays! Yay! The students have been absolutely worthless since their exams last week. I have NEVER been so glad to get out of there. And a lot of the teachers are moving to new classrooms over the break, due to the opening of the NEW BUILDING. So I spent the afternoon packing up my office and moving boxes and crates to my new classroom. Yes, they have people who will do that, but crates. They are open on top. I don't want stuff getting messed up. And I mostly wanted to make sure it all went to the right room. Because face it, some of the people who move us can't read properly. I needed to know that my stuff was where I needed it in January. Of course, they haven't moved the previous teacher completely out yet, so it's still possible that they'll move my stuff with hers. That would suck. It is labelled though. Ahh, literacy.
I am just so glad to be done. At least for the next two weeks. I feel relieved. It will be nice to just work one job for a little while. I thought it was funny when people would tell me to "Enjoy your break!" Break? What's that? I'll be at the bookstore nearly every day. No break for me. That's okay. It's still better than being at school!
Sunday, December 17, 2006
More blessings, and more
I wanted everyone to know that I've added more Christmas pictures to the Tour. Sorry about the delay.
Also, there have been even more blessings since Friday afternoon. That night, a friend of mine came by the bookstore to visit for a few minutes. She brought a small gift with her. It was gift cards to the movies. We had talked at church the previous Sunday about how Hubs and I always go to the movies for our birthdays. She knows that his bday is this week, so she and her husband decided to help us continue our bday tradition. And she even offered to watch the boys!
This morning at church, there was another mysterious envelope waiting for us. Inside was note that said someone wanted to help us out and "it isn't much." Just a Target gift card worth $150! Hubs and I are completely overwhelmed by the outpouring of love from this congregation. Obviously, the Spirit of God has moved into our congregation and is moving them this holiday. I am so greatful to all the wonderful people who have helped make this Christmas so special for us!
And so you know, Hubs and I are planning on writing a Thank You to our special Christmas angels and putting it in the church bulletin next Sunday. Even though we don't know who they are, we want them to know how much their gifts are appreciated.
In an unrelated note, my sister passed her National Board Certification for kindergarten! Yay! Now she gets a HUGE pay raise and mucho respect. She and her husgand are talking about having a second child now that they can pay for daycare. I am so excited! I hope they decide to have LOTS of babies! Yippee!
Also, there have been even more blessings since Friday afternoon. That night, a friend of mine came by the bookstore to visit for a few minutes. She brought a small gift with her. It was gift cards to the movies. We had talked at church the previous Sunday about how Hubs and I always go to the movies for our birthdays. She knows that his bday is this week, so she and her husband decided to help us continue our bday tradition. And she even offered to watch the boys!
This morning at church, there was another mysterious envelope waiting for us. Inside was note that said someone wanted to help us out and "it isn't much." Just a Target gift card worth $150! Hubs and I are completely overwhelmed by the outpouring of love from this congregation. Obviously, the Spirit of God has moved into our congregation and is moving them this holiday. I am so greatful to all the wonderful people who have helped make this Christmas so special for us!
And so you know, Hubs and I are planning on writing a Thank You to our special Christmas angels and putting it in the church bulletin next Sunday. Even though we don't know who they are, we want them to know how much their gifts are appreciated.
In an unrelated note, my sister passed her National Board Certification for kindergarten! Yay! Now she gets a HUGE pay raise and mucho respect. She and her husgand are talking about having a second child now that they can pay for daycare. I am so excited! I hope they decide to have LOTS of babies! Yippee!
Friday, December 15, 2006
Christmas Blessings
I don't have much time, as I'm leaving for work in about 40 minutes. But I'm feeling particularly blessed today, so I thought I would share some blessings with you.
These Christmas Pooh's are the first things you see when you come through our front door. I collected them back when I worked at the Disney Store in college. Some are limited edition.
Give me a break! I am working two jobs right now. I'll post more pics when we can actually put presents under the tree.
Hubs and I are well loved. We have some awesome friends! In the mail this week, we received an anonymous Christmas card from someone at church. Enclosed was a $100 Wal-Mart gift card. Yesterday, also at church, Hubs received another anonymous card. Enclosed was a check for $300. Today, I got a card from the other teachers in the magnet program where I teach. Enclosed were 2-$100 gift cards from "Santa" for my boys.
I guess I shouldn't be amazed any more by how the Lord takes care of His own. I know that there are some truly wonderful Christmas angels out there. I wish I could thank them all by name, but I will have to settle for saying a generic "Thanks and God Bless" instead.
I leave you with some scenes from our Christmas tree.
The boys in front of the Christmas tree.
These Christmas Pooh's are the first things you see when you come through our front door. I collected them back when I worked at the Disney Store in college. Some are limited edition.
This scene is on top of the entertainment center. We keep our Christmas cards in the snowman at the left. The Santa was a gift, and he's really cool. Note also the wedding photos on the wall.
This is our mantle. LOVE our stockings. Thanks, LL Bean! The nativity is made of olive wood from Isreal. Hubs and I bought it our first married Christmas. (We had to glue a wise man back on this year though. Oops!)
Be sure to visit BooMama's Christmas Tour of Homes to see some real holiday cheer:
Give me a break! I am working two jobs right now. I'll post more pics when we can actually put presents under the tree.
Wednesday, December 06, 2006
Tis the Season
Come join in BooMama's Christmas Tour of Homes on December 15. I'll be up from having to work half the night, so it won't be a problem for me. That is, if we can get the decorations up before then. The plan is for Saturday. We should make it in plenty of time for the 15th.
BTW, Hubs got a job!!! Yay!!! He's waiting tables at a local family sports pub. No, seriously, that's what it's called. A Family. Sports. Pub. I try not to think about it. Anyhoo, he started training tonight, so hopefully he'll be on his own next week and making the big tips! It's usually pretty full, especially on football Sundays. Unfortunately, because of the whole "pastor-in-training" thing, he won't be working during the big game days. Oh well. There's still Friday and Saturday night.
And have I mentioned that I'm working at a bookstore. And I LOVE IT!!!! It is the best time! I would love to make that a full-time gig. Hmmm... retail management....
Monday, November 27, 2006
Happy Turkeys
I am so frustrated. Honestly. You'd think I wasn't working two jobs, doing laundry, cleaning the kitchen, and taking care of two kids. I'd love to sit around a library all day, or in class, learning. Taking notes. Learning. What a concept! If we could switch, that would be awesome.
I'm not asking for much. Just fold the clothes when you do the laundry. Don't just dump them on the lounger and let them sit for 3 days. Empty the garbage when it's full. Put your cereal bowl in the dishwasher! Geez! You're 28 years old! You know how to open the damn dishwasher. I am not your mom!
Who, by the way, decided to clean the kitchen when she came for Thanksgiving. Hubs asked her TWICE to stop wiping up the counters and sink - WITH. A. SPONGE. of all things - but she said she didn't have anything else to do. Um, try playing with your grandsons, you old cow! Good Lord! I even sent the boys outside so that she would get out of the house and let Hubs cook in peace. But NOOOOOOOO!!!! I thought I was going to lose it. Really.
There. I said it. And yes, in my previous post, I remarked about how I am greatful for such generous in-laws. And I am. I really am. But I need her to NOT clean my counters. with a sponge. Did I mention she used a sponge???? The nastiest germ-carrying option. Does she not watch Oprah? NO. She's too busy cleaning my kitchen!
Okay, I'm done.
And tonight my mom was on my case about wanting to make sure that Cheeseboy goes to Sunday School every week. Does she not get that Hubs is studying to be a pastor? And that we are VERY involved in our church? And that my child's walk with Christ is the most important thing in his young life? She was actually giving me a hard time. And accusing me of accusing HER of being a bad grandma. I said no such thing. Nothing!
But does she not remember skipping church A LOT when I was young? We hardly ever went. She thinks this is all Hubs' doing. "You sound like your husband!" she says. Like it's a bad thing that God is important to us. You'd think a parent would be proud that her daughter is so committed to walking with the Lord.
Whatever. I have more things to rant about, but I have a ton of papers to grade that are leftover from my Thanksgiving "break" from school that wasn't really a "break" because I was working 40 hours at my other part-time job that I have because Hubs is in school and incapable of working. Did I mention that my mom is on his case for that too? It's been a fun week.
I'm not asking for much. Just fold the clothes when you do the laundry. Don't just dump them on the lounger and let them sit for 3 days. Empty the garbage when it's full. Put your cereal bowl in the dishwasher! Geez! You're 28 years old! You know how to open the damn dishwasher. I am not your mom!
Who, by the way, decided to clean the kitchen when she came for Thanksgiving. Hubs asked her TWICE to stop wiping up the counters and sink - WITH. A. SPONGE. of all things - but she said she didn't have anything else to do. Um, try playing with your grandsons, you old cow! Good Lord! I even sent the boys outside so that she would get out of the house and let Hubs cook in peace. But NOOOOOOOO!!!! I thought I was going to lose it. Really.
There. I said it. And yes, in my previous post, I remarked about how I am greatful for such generous in-laws. And I am. I really am. But I need her to NOT clean my counters. with a sponge. Did I mention she used a sponge???? The nastiest germ-carrying option. Does she not watch Oprah? NO. She's too busy cleaning my kitchen!
Okay, I'm done.
And tonight my mom was on my case about wanting to make sure that Cheeseboy goes to Sunday School every week. Does she not get that Hubs is studying to be a pastor? And that we are VERY involved in our church? And that my child's walk with Christ is the most important thing in his young life? She was actually giving me a hard time. And accusing me of accusing HER of being a bad grandma. I said no such thing. Nothing!
But does she not remember skipping church A LOT when I was young? We hardly ever went. She thinks this is all Hubs' doing. "You sound like your husband!" she says. Like it's a bad thing that God is important to us. You'd think a parent would be proud that her daughter is so committed to walking with the Lord.
Whatever. I have more things to rant about, but I have a ton of papers to grade that are leftover from my Thanksgiving "break" from school that wasn't really a "break" because I was working 40 hours at my other part-time job that I have because Hubs is in school and incapable of working. Did I mention that my mom is on his case for that too? It's been a fun week.
Monday, November 13, 2006
Getting Into the Spirit
Having been sent over by BooMama to A Broad In Athens, I was inspired to make a list of the 20 things I'm most thankful for (in no particular order):
1. I'm thankful for those two sweet little boys who still like to cuddle on the couch with their mom.
2. I'm thankful for my job, even if I don't always like it.
3. I'm thankful for my students, especially when they have an "a-ha" moment.
4. I'm thankful that my car is still running.
5. I'm thankful that the Hubs didn't have a complete breakdown during his last depressed episode.
6. I'm thankful that my mom lives nearby and is willing to watch my kids almost any time I need her.
7. I'm thankful that my sister, her husband, and my niece live close enough that the boys can get to know their cousin.
8. I'm thankful that for the most part, Colby is doing a great job at school and is learning so much!
9. I am thankful that we found such an awesome in-home daycare for Bennett, and that it is right up the street!
10. I am thankful that I get to be surrounded by books at my "other" job in the bookstore. How blessed am I!
11. I am thankful that my dad cares enough about his grandsons that he is willing to drive 6 hours to come visit for a day.
12. I'm thankful that my cousin was admitted to the bar in SC. This may prompt his mom (my fave aunt) to come live here. She is DREAM with the kids!
13. I'm thankful for the new friends I'm making at church.
14. I'm thankful that these new friends have kids almost the exact same ages as Colby and Bennett. Built in play dates!
15. I'm thankful that every Sunday, I get to help lead the congregation in worshipping the Lord. Every Sunday!
16. I am thankful for my wonderful husband who has the courage to follow his call and become a pastor.
17. I am thankful for the Internet, without which I would not have such a great relationship to my extended family. Thanks be to God for myfamily.com!
18. I am thankful that I will be getting my very own classroom again in January! Patience pays off!
19. I'm thankful for my in-laws (there, I said it), who are willing to write a check to their son and daughter-in-law because we are in financial difficulties.
20. I am thankful for my mom's partner who is so generous, that she buys us groceries. She also loves me, and my kids, like we were born of her own flesh. Sometimes, I think she loves us more than my mom does.
So, what are you thankful for?
1. I'm thankful for those two sweet little boys who still like to cuddle on the couch with their mom.
2. I'm thankful for my job, even if I don't always like it.
3. I'm thankful for my students, especially when they have an "a-ha" moment.
4. I'm thankful that my car is still running.
5. I'm thankful that the Hubs didn't have a complete breakdown during his last depressed episode.
6. I'm thankful that my mom lives nearby and is willing to watch my kids almost any time I need her.
7. I'm thankful that my sister, her husband, and my niece live close enough that the boys can get to know their cousin.
8. I'm thankful that for the most part, Colby is doing a great job at school and is learning so much!
9. I am thankful that we found such an awesome in-home daycare for Bennett, and that it is right up the street!
10. I am thankful that I get to be surrounded by books at my "other" job in the bookstore. How blessed am I!
11. I am thankful that my dad cares enough about his grandsons that he is willing to drive 6 hours to come visit for a day.
12. I'm thankful that my cousin was admitted to the bar in SC. This may prompt his mom (my fave aunt) to come live here. She is DREAM with the kids!
13. I'm thankful for the new friends I'm making at church.
14. I'm thankful that these new friends have kids almost the exact same ages as Colby and Bennett. Built in play dates!
15. I'm thankful that every Sunday, I get to help lead the congregation in worshipping the Lord. Every Sunday!
16. I am thankful for my wonderful husband who has the courage to follow his call and become a pastor.
17. I am thankful for the Internet, without which I would not have such a great relationship to my extended family. Thanks be to God for myfamily.com!
18. I am thankful that I will be getting my very own classroom again in January! Patience pays off!
19. I'm thankful for my in-laws (there, I said it), who are willing to write a check to their son and daughter-in-law because we are in financial difficulties.
20. I am thankful for my mom's partner who is so generous, that she buys us groceries. She also loves me, and my kids, like we were born of her own flesh. Sometimes, I think she loves us more than my mom does.
So, what are you thankful for?
Thursday, November 09, 2006
Every Day, Like the One Before
The pictures from Halloween are still on the camera. There is still candy in the kids' buckets. Spiderman is well and good. The little elephant is too.
I have been working my ass off this week. (not literally, unfortunately) As I've mentioned, I have started a new job at a local bookseller. Fun! I love books! Well, I USED to love books. Now, I think that Stephen King needs to get a life already! Please, somebody, make him stop writing!! If for no other reason than I'm tired of shelving his damn books! There's, like, a million of them! Anyway, this bookseller is getting ready to open a new store near my home. Sooooo, we've been getting everything ready for the grand opening. It's been pretty interesting. It went from totally empty but for the shelves, to being completely full of books in about 24 hours. So cool!
I've met some really neat people this week. Really, it takes all kinds, right? There's a couple of us teachers, some college kids, and some people for whom part-time is a way of life. And the managers! Yowza! One of them is brilliant. No really, she is. She speaks like 9 languages, fluently. Including Latin! Odd but true. She could be anything. And she chooses this? To each their own!
This week in kid news has not been terrible. Well, except for the red card for Colby yesterday. Because of the other kid's bloody nose. Yes. Bloody nose. They were playing "monster", and there was a ball involved. I don't think Colby meant to hurt the other kid. I hope not anyway. But either way, the ball was thrown. The other kid ended up in the nurse's office with a bloody nose. I was SHOCKED. And MORTIFIED. I just wanted the earth to open up so that I could JUMP into the crack and stay there forever.
Wit's end. I'm at my wit's end.
Bennett won't eat. He doesn't like hot dogs, chicken nuggets, spaghetti, green beans, mac'n'cheese, nothing. He used to LOVE those foods. Now, nothing. We can't get him to sit still long enough to ingest anything. And he's not exactly the world's chunkiest kid to begin with either. In fact, my sons are known for their skinniness. (is that a word?) They are tiny things, with no tummy or bottom to speak of. Poor Bennett is just wasting away! Well, not really, but he's not putting on weight. He's always been pretty small, but still! He did eat some of the spaghetti SAUCE tonight at dinner, so that's something.
That's about all for now. I'll have to write some other time when I can just ramble. Oh wait. That's what I'm doing now. Whatever.
I have been working my ass off this week. (not literally, unfortunately) As I've mentioned, I have started a new job at a local bookseller. Fun! I love books! Well, I USED to love books. Now, I think that Stephen King needs to get a life already! Please, somebody, make him stop writing!! If for no other reason than I'm tired of shelving his damn books! There's, like, a million of them! Anyway, this bookseller is getting ready to open a new store near my home. Sooooo, we've been getting everything ready for the grand opening. It's been pretty interesting. It went from totally empty but for the shelves, to being completely full of books in about 24 hours. So cool!
I've met some really neat people this week. Really, it takes all kinds, right? There's a couple of us teachers, some college kids, and some people for whom part-time is a way of life. And the managers! Yowza! One of them is brilliant. No really, she is. She speaks like 9 languages, fluently. Including Latin! Odd but true. She could be anything. And she chooses this? To each their own!
This week in kid news has not been terrible. Well, except for the red card for Colby yesterday. Because of the other kid's bloody nose. Yes. Bloody nose. They were playing "monster", and there was a ball involved. I don't think Colby meant to hurt the other kid. I hope not anyway. But either way, the ball was thrown. The other kid ended up in the nurse's office with a bloody nose. I was SHOCKED. And MORTIFIED. I just wanted the earth to open up so that I could JUMP into the crack and stay there forever.
Wit's end. I'm at my wit's end.
Bennett won't eat. He doesn't like hot dogs, chicken nuggets, spaghetti, green beans, mac'n'cheese, nothing. He used to LOVE those foods. Now, nothing. We can't get him to sit still long enough to ingest anything. And he's not exactly the world's chunkiest kid to begin with either. In fact, my sons are known for their skinniness. (is that a word?) They are tiny things, with no tummy or bottom to speak of. Poor Bennett is just wasting away! Well, not really, but he's not putting on weight. He's always been pretty small, but still! He did eat some of the spaghetti SAUCE tonight at dinner, so that's something.
That's about all for now. I'll have to write some other time when I can just ramble. Oh wait. That's what I'm doing now. Whatever.
Tuesday, October 31, 2006
Happy Halloween!
It's Halloween! Happy Halloween!
OMG! The kids at school today were so crazy! Luckily, I managed to calm down a couple of classes by giving them a test. I'm so mean. Actually, it wasn't too bad a day. My first two classes had donuts, courtesy of parents. We celebrated a girl's birthday in first block. In second block, hmm, I'm not really sure why we had donuts. And cookies. But I'll tell you, I was HIGH!! I'd taken some cold medicine before class. Then had some hot chocolate. Then a glazed donut. The some Mountain Dew. Then a donut with orange (yum) icing and sprinkles. And some more Mountain Dew. I was flying! I have no idea what went on in my classes. I'm such a responsible teacher.
In third and fourth blocks, the kids took a test on Hercules. It was 25 whole multiple-choice questions. So hard. (Hear sarcasm here) Then they got to color a Halloween themed picture. Of course, they had to use their knowledge of Latin colors in order to follow the key. Of course, some of them didn't finish in class. So, now they have COLORING homework. From Latin class. It's funny.
Then in 5th and 6th block, we took a test. It was not a particularly hard test. It was not a terribly easy test. The kids thought it was pretty easy. I tried not to make it too difficult. As much as those 8th graders annoy the piss out of me, I really don't want them to fail. Well, most of them anyway. There are a couple that I'd like to flunk. If I'm being honest. And why not? This is my blog. None of my students know it exists. And they'd never think to look for me under this name.
Coming up next: the exciting world of trick-or-treating. We're going out to my sister's and going with her daughter in their neighborhood. Which is just as well, since we're too poor to buy candy to hand out this year. I'd feel bad taking my neighbors' candy if I'm not participating. Ya know? I'll post some pictures later of the kids. Colby is dressing as Spiderman, as he's been doing for the past month. And Bennett is going as an elephant. Yeah, I know. Poor kid. But it was free and it will fit. I hope. We haven't actually tried it on him. Guess if worse comes to worse (what does that mean anyway) we can always put him in one of my neice's Cinderella outfits. (hee hee)
OMG! The kids at school today were so crazy! Luckily, I managed to calm down a couple of classes by giving them a test. I'm so mean. Actually, it wasn't too bad a day. My first two classes had donuts, courtesy of parents. We celebrated a girl's birthday in first block. In second block, hmm, I'm not really sure why we had donuts. And cookies. But I'll tell you, I was HIGH!! I'd taken some cold medicine before class. Then had some hot chocolate. Then a glazed donut. The some Mountain Dew. Then a donut with orange (yum) icing and sprinkles. And some more Mountain Dew. I was flying! I have no idea what went on in my classes. I'm such a responsible teacher.
In third and fourth blocks, the kids took a test on Hercules. It was 25 whole multiple-choice questions. So hard. (Hear sarcasm here) Then they got to color a Halloween themed picture. Of course, they had to use their knowledge of Latin colors in order to follow the key. Of course, some of them didn't finish in class. So, now they have COLORING homework. From Latin class. It's funny.
Then in 5th and 6th block, we took a test. It was not a particularly hard test. It was not a terribly easy test. The kids thought it was pretty easy. I tried not to make it too difficult. As much as those 8th graders annoy the piss out of me, I really don't want them to fail. Well, most of them anyway. There are a couple that I'd like to flunk. If I'm being honest. And why not? This is my blog. None of my students know it exists. And they'd never think to look for me under this name.
Coming up next: the exciting world of trick-or-treating. We're going out to my sister's and going with her daughter in their neighborhood. Which is just as well, since we're too poor to buy candy to hand out this year. I'd feel bad taking my neighbors' candy if I'm not participating. Ya know? I'll post some pictures later of the kids. Colby is dressing as Spiderman, as he's been doing for the past month. And Bennett is going as an elephant. Yeah, I know. Poor kid. But it was free and it will fit. I hope. We haven't actually tried it on him. Guess if worse comes to worse (what does that mean anyway) we can always put him in one of my neice's Cinderella outfits. (hee hee)
Thursday, October 26, 2006
It's official. I've got a second job. I got my schedule for next week. Wednesday night, Friday night, Saturday all afternoon and early evening. There goes my life. See ya! Don't let the door hit you on your way out! I didn't want to spend any time with my kids anyway.
Colby has been having difficulties in school again. He's been on red once, orange once, yellow once, and green once. Evidently, he enjoys playing "guns" at school with his little buddy. They are not allowed to do that. You know, school violence and all begins at the preschool level. He's also having so much fun during the day that he refuses to stop to go pee. So he's going in his pants instead. This has happened three times this week. And tomorrow still to go! He used to be potty trained. I'm not sure what is happening here. I feel like we've lost control of the sweet little boy I used to know.
I've wondered if all this acting out is a cry for something else. My mom, because she knows all, thinks that this could be some kind of post-surgery psycho thing. Like, he's reacting to the trauma of surgery. But that was almost three months ago. Is there some kind of time limit on these things? And how do you ask a four-year-old if he's feeling traumatized by his surgery that happened three months ago? Should we find some kind of child psychologist?Argh! I cannot deal with anything else right now.
Is there some kind of limit to how much crap can go on in your life all at the same time? I think we're there.
Colby has been having difficulties in school again. He's been on red once, orange once, yellow once, and green once. Evidently, he enjoys playing "guns" at school with his little buddy. They are not allowed to do that. You know, school violence and all begins at the preschool level. He's also having so much fun during the day that he refuses to stop to go pee. So he's going in his pants instead. This has happened three times this week. And tomorrow still to go! He used to be potty trained. I'm not sure what is happening here. I feel like we've lost control of the sweet little boy I used to know.
I've wondered if all this acting out is a cry for something else. My mom, because she knows all, thinks that this could be some kind of post-surgery psycho thing. Like, he's reacting to the trauma of surgery. But that was almost three months ago. Is there some kind of time limit on these things? And how do you ask a four-year-old if he's feeling traumatized by his surgery that happened three months ago? Should we find some kind of child psychologist?Argh! I cannot deal with anything else right now.
Is there some kind of limit to how much crap can go on in your life all at the same time? I think we're there.
Monday, October 23, 2006
Under the Weather
It's fall. The time when a man's fancy turns to thoughts of snuggling naked under a comforter. When my thoughts turn to Where are we going to get the money for daycare? For the mortgage? For the electric/water/phone/cell phone?
Why haven't I heard back from that job I interviewed for where the manager practically had me sign the papers on the spot? I didn't really want to have to work another job until midnight most nights, but when you're looking at losing your house, anything looks good.
Why won't hubs get a job? He just dropped two classes, because he was feeling overwhelmed. Um, hello!? He's got the time. If he could just learn to read faster, or more effectively.
Why do I have to deal with everything? Calling the hospital to set up payment plans. Making sure the bills are paid. Earning the money. Cooking. Cleaning. Doing laundry.
I am so tired. So very tired. I'd like to just curl up in a little ball and go to sleep. But I have to go grade papers. And I have to fill out financial assistance forms. And the DSS forms for food stamps. And the forms to see if we qualify for Medicaid. Because I have no pride anymore. I believe we have hit rock bottom.
It's lonely down here.
Sorry this is so depressing. But I've had a rough time lately. If anyone would like to make donations, please email. I will be happy to send you my address.
Why haven't I heard back from that job I interviewed for where the manager practically had me sign the papers on the spot? I didn't really want to have to work another job until midnight most nights, but when you're looking at losing your house, anything looks good.
Why won't hubs get a job? He just dropped two classes, because he was feeling overwhelmed. Um, hello!? He's got the time. If he could just learn to read faster, or more effectively.
Why do I have to deal with everything? Calling the hospital to set up payment plans. Making sure the bills are paid. Earning the money. Cooking. Cleaning. Doing laundry.
I am so tired. So very tired. I'd like to just curl up in a little ball and go to sleep. But I have to go grade papers. And I have to fill out financial assistance forms. And the DSS forms for food stamps. And the forms to see if we qualify for Medicaid. Because I have no pride anymore. I believe we have hit rock bottom.
It's lonely down here.
Sorry this is so depressing. But I've had a rough time lately. If anyone would like to make donations, please email. I will be happy to send you my address.
Wednesday, October 11, 2006
Happy Second Birthday, Bennett
What a special day! Why? Because two years ago, I became a twice-baked mommy with the addition of Bennett.
Half an hour later, we had Bennett!
Hubs and I got up early that morning of October 11. We'd picked out that date for the c-section. I don't know why. It just seemed like a good day, and it would allow my in-laws to not have to miss any football games over the next weekend. (Honestly, that was part of it.) Anyway, my moms came over around 5:30 am. They were taking care of Colby while we were in the hospital.
We drove mostly in silence. I know that I was nervous about having a second child. How could I possibly love another baby as much as I loved my first? What would we do with another mouth to feed? How would we ever pay for daycare? Would my recovery be okay? Would the baby be okay, or would he have to go to the NICU too?
The nurses prepped me: cleaned my tummy, checked my vitals, took 3 tries to get in an IV. I talked to the anesthesiologist about a thousand times. The doc came in to check on me. Then, it was showtime!
Half an hour later, we had Bennett!
If nothing else, Bennett has been an adventure. Literally. He's not afraid of anything or anyone. From the very beginning, he had his own little personality. Sleep on my back? I think not! Eat constantly? I think so! Sleep through the night? No problem!
He would take his own sweet time doing other things: rolling over, cutting teeth, crawling, talking. However, he's been a pioneer. He loves to climb. Anything, anytime, anywhere. He's not afraid of animals. He's not afraid of the hair clippers. He's not afraid of that dead cockroach in the corner of the classroom at the church. (He tried to eat it. Thank God that Pastor Barrett was paying attention!) No vacuum wakes him, nor does lightning or thunder.
He is so curious about everything. He wants to use that big boy potty so badly! He wants to sleep in the bunk bed with his big brother. (Um, no!) What is that cool, shiny thing on the back of the car? An exhaust pipe? Can I touch it? Ouch! What does it feel like to go head-first off the side of the couch? Ouch!
And he wants to be Colby so much! All he does is follow his big brother around all day. When Colby was into dinosaurs, Bennett had to play too. When Colby liked the Wiggles (glad that's over), Bennett had to play the Wiggle guitar too. Now that Colby's into Spiderman/Superman/Batman, Bennett must have them as well. It is so cute! Well, I think it's cute. Colby doesn't much like it though.
All in all, I am so blessed to have Bennett as my second son. He brings out the best in me. He still loves to cuddle with his mommy. At night, we say our prayers together. Then, I sing "You Are My Sunshine". He lifts his little head and places his forehead against mine as I sing. His blue eyes look right into my brown ones, and he sees into my heart. He knows that I love him more than words.
Happy Second Birthday, Angel baby!
Saturday, October 07, 2006
My Favorite Email Ever
Let me start by saying that Colby has been having some issues lately. He's just turned four, and this has apparently made him think that he rules the universe. While it is true that he gets his way a lot of the time, because really it's just easier than explaining WHY he can't have a Spiderman popsicle 5 minutes before dinner, it has not been pleasant to live with.
If you have small children, you are probably familiar with the green-yellow-orange-red progression that is commonly used in schools to show how a child's behavior was that day. Well, my dear Colby has been orange twice in the past two weeks. And on Wednesday, a half-day at school, in only 3 hours, he was red. RED. RED!!! Holy shit!
In my wildest dreams, I never imagined that a child of mine would ever stoop to behavior so bad that it would require a RED. Never! But it was. He was. I was so disappointed. I was so embarrassed.
Then, yesterday, I was checking my email at the end of the day, and I saw one from his teacher. All the subject said was "Colby :)" I took that to be a good sign. Inside the email was this:
mo mmmmmmmmmmmmmy and daddy,
iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii aam haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaviiiii ng a beeeeeeeeeeetterrr day! :::;;;;;;;;;;;;)'
colby
I was near tears. I laughed and laughed, and almost cried. My baby, my angel boy, he wrote his first email. At the tender age of four. I immediately forwarded it to the hubs. He loved it too. We've saved it. It's too sweet.
And thank God he had a better day. Otherwise, he would have lost all the skin on his bottom.
Monday, October 02, 2006
OLTA final
Almost forgot.
Weight: 162 lbs.
Size: 12
Attitude: improving
I'm not quite as depressed as last week. It was nice having the weekend to just veg.
Even though I haven't changed any sizes, I am happy to say that I maintained. I didn't get to go the gym AT ALL, and my life has been one shit pile after another during this whole experience. But I'm okay with that. I'm proud of myself for not giving up when things got rough, and really, isn't that what life is all about?
So I'm mentally preparing to kiss someone's (tiny) ass soon. Who will it be?
And I'm so glad I made some new bloggy friends! It's been great having you ladies to talk to and share with. I hope you keep coming around!
Weight: 162 lbs.
Size: 12
Attitude: improving
I'm not quite as depressed as last week. It was nice having the weekend to just veg.
Even though I haven't changed any sizes, I am happy to say that I maintained. I didn't get to go the gym AT ALL, and my life has been one shit pile after another during this whole experience. But I'm okay with that. I'm proud of myself for not giving up when things got rough, and really, isn't that what life is all about?
So I'm mentally preparing to kiss someone's (tiny) ass soon. Who will it be?
And I'm so glad I made some new bloggy friends! It's been great having you ladies to talk to and share with. I hope you keep coming around!
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