Where Do I Go?

Dear Pastor,
I was able to overlook the first incident. When you told W what he couldn't wear to church as the lay leder. After all, what difference do the clothes make anyway? W says it's not a huge deal to him, so I accept it.

The second was a bit harder. When T took the reigns on finding a new FM coordinator, putting her own address and email on the forms, submitting them only God knows where, and "pre-screening" candidates. I was pretty upset when you told W to back off and stop irritating T. What she was doing was wrong, period. Against the spirit of the way the church committee was supposed to work. What's the point of having a committee, if you're just going to let one person do whatever s/he wants? At that point, I was willing, even wanting, to walk away. But I've been coming still, hoping things would be better. Hoping to respect you again.

Today, though, I'm done. When you take away my right, my obligation, to celebrate the Eucharist every Sunday, I am done. In your EMAIL, you said that there's no directive as to frequency in either the Bible or the Book of Discipline. Even if that is so, the history of this particular church is having Communion every week. We celebrate Christ's last supper because we are exhorted to as often as we can, whenever we're together. It is in the Bible.

You want to replace this part of church with an altar call. Really? This is NOT a tradition of this church. I'm not opposed to new things, but I don't see why you'd have to take out something so meaningful for something else. Couldn't you do it, as W suggested when we talked, during the last song? Or after the service?

So, you see, I'm fed up. I cannot worship in a place I don't recognize anymore. In a place that seems to be turning into something I don't like. I can't listen to someone who wants to change special things that should be left alone. Someone I don't respect.

I hope it goes well for you, Pastor. I hope this change brings about whatever you are trying to accomplish. I won't be there to find out.

Sincerely,
Me

Mad Crazy or Crazy Mad?

My best friend, W, is the lay leader at our church. If you are unfamiliar with this "job", let me explain. The lay leader is chosen by the church to assist the pastor with various duties on Sunday mornings. At our church, this includes praying for the congregation, helping with communion, and closing prayer. W also has other duties outside of Sunday mornings, like coordinating readers and assigning more communion help. He is also a member of every single committee of the church. He is the voice of the congregation to the pastor. This is NOT a paid position.

Last week, Pastor called W to a meeting. One of the things they discussed was W's attire on a Sunday morning. Some Sundays, he wears khakis and a button-down shirt or polo. Other Sundays, he wears jeans, but always with a dressy-ish shirt. Apparently, this is unacceptable. People have complained about the way he dresses. Not about his prayers, his attitude, but his CLOTHES.

W has been attending this church for over 10 years. He has always dressed this way. No one ever had a problem with this, until the past few months.

I don't understand. Did Jesus wear a suit and tie to the synagogue every week? I'm sure he didn't go unclean, as that would have violated sacred laws. But W isn't coming to church dirty. His jeans don't have holes in them. He is always dressed well.

Outside of our church, next to the road, there is a sign inviting people to "Come as you are...REALLY!" No, it really says that. Clearly, that doesn't mean much to these small-minded so-called Christians.

Trying Again

It's been a long day. I mean, I was given the standard 24 hours like everyone else. It has FELT like a long day. My 2 older sons have been at each other all day. My husband was out of town for business. That is not unusual; he travels every day. But he's not coming home until tomorrow, so it made him feel even more absent if that makes any sense.

And I was thinking, why? Why did I feel more overwhelmed than usual today? All summer long, it's been me at home with two unruly boys and one baby. Every day. Twenty-four hours a day. Seven days a week. For eight straight weeks. Wow. I love my kids. They are the best gift God has given me. But they are truly lucky to still be alive.

But I can see how that could lead to a feeling of being under a large pile of bricks.

I have dreamed in the past of being a stay at home mom. I have done it before, these past eight summers since having our first child. It seemed so lovely!

Now, I know my limitations. I'm good for about five weeks, if there are planned activities. After that, all bets are off. Especially when there is no "mommy time." Who knew how precious those work days were? When I just got to be the teacher, and didn't have to be on the job the ENTIRE day? Where kids actually listen, and don't spit on each other? Where I don't have to clean up the mess, do the laundry, and supervise bedtime? (Though I would love to add naptime to the school day!) Even just getting out for two hours of shopping feels like a vacation!

I have a whole new respect for mom's who work IN the home. Hats off! Because I certainly couldn't do it. But I will bravely try again next summer. And the next. And the next. Until the last son, who is 14 weeks old, finally goes off to college. Perhaps by then I'll have it figured out.

Welcome Home?

I looked at my poor, neglected blog today at the request of my step-mom. It's been over a year since I've been on here. Wow. Who knew my life had gotten so busy that I couldn't write anymore. But who needs a blog when you update your Facebook status all day, and tweet your random thoughts to the world?

Turns out I do.

So today, I can already tell, is going to be one of those days. I'm having a lady-fun week. I'm completely exhausted from getting up in the middle of the night to pump (moms understand). And the high today is going to be 96.

And the new baby is waking up. Perhaps I'll get to finish whining later. If I can find the time. Sigh.

slow weekend

I feel like I got some time off. We didn't have anything major going on this weekend, so it was almost like having a vacation. Saturday, I actually got all the laundry done with daylight left to burn. In the morning, Cheese let us sleep in until 7:00! Then the boys watched Alvin and the Chipmunks: the Squeekwul. B-rex had t-ball practice that morning, but my sweet husband took care of that so I could work in the house. I got to go to Zumba, which is always fun!

The rest of the day was lazy. The boys played outside with their friend from across the street. Weston and I had a movie night at home. Rented Couples Retreat. Funny! I recommend it for laughs. We have discovered the Redbox method of renting movies. Only $1 per night. Because how many nights in a row are you really going to watch a movie? It's perfect for us.

Today, we had church in the morning. The boys had a friend come over afterwards, so they were out of our hair. Weston and I both got to go for a run this afternoon. Then the boys had UP! (church for kids) this evening. Weston volunteered with the youth, and I got to shop a bit.

Overall, great weekend. Top 10 for sure!

vacation boredom

you've all been on vacation. The first couple of days are like a honeymoon. Everything is exciting and new! You are enjoying the kids for the first time in ages. Then, about day four, reality sets in. You've done all the cool stuff, and you're stuck watching cartoons.

This feeling is amplified when you are visiting family during your vacation. Of course you don't expect them to take off the whole time you're there. After all, they do have to earn a living, and it's not like they want to waste all their vacation time on you. I am there. We spent the last couple of days exploring the Prattville area. Now, the grandparents have returned to work, and I don't know my way around town. So we're sitting here at their house watching cartoons. Which we could be doing at our house.

How do we beat the vacation blues? How do I entertain the kids the rest of the day today and ALL day tomorrow? Please give mesome ideas!!

And when I'm bored, I tend to snack. Not good!

Lazy Day

I am sitting outside, enjoying the quiet and warmth of an Alabama morning. I love porch-type swings. So peaceful. The boys are being nice to each other. I can hear birds singing. It's not too warm yet, though the heat is surely coming.

B-rex is hitting plastic golf balls off of a tee. I can't tell if he has no skills, or if the club is too big for him. Probably a bit of both. The boys have been practicing their golf swing. They managed to break the kid-sized clubs last time we were here. (There's nothing my boys can't break!) Now they're making due with Grandpa's clubs. Some sort of wedge, maybe? I don't know anything about golf.

I am reminded of other quiet times. Times B.C. = before children. When I could enjoy being outside without the threat of a ball/bat/club coming at my head. Now, my silence is interrupted by "Mom! I can't find my shoes!" I didn't take them off. Why would I have any idea where they are? And yet the search must be undertaken, because I am the mommy. That's my job. So much for quiet and rest!

spring vacation

So this morning started my official vacation. I woke up early, so we could get an early start. No such luck. Between the snuggling and last-minute packing, we didn't leave until 9.

The boys did a great job in the car. They were almost completely silent for the first hour. Cheese put his MP3 player on, and that was pretty much the last I heard from him. B-rex spent most of the trip playing with his new, giant plastic spider. I can't imagine who would have let him buy something like that. (hint: it was me)

I can't believe they were so well-behaved! When we drive the 3 miles to church, they fight. When we drive the 10 minutes to BiLo, they fight. Even on the 3 minute drive to Publix! Nothing but shouting and hitting. But a 7-hour drive? No problem! Who knew?

I'll keep you updated. B-rex already has a splinter, and I had to buy a new dress. I can't believe I forgot my Easter dress!