Running

I am not a runner. I hate running. It is tedious, boring, sweaty, and just all around no fun. I have never been a runner. I was a cheerleader in high school, back in the days when it was just pom poms. We just had to be skinny and cute.

I was those things: skinny and cute. I had the ability to eat whatever (Snickers or pizza and a Dr. Pepper every day for lunch!) and stay that way. I did not diet in high school. At least not that I remember.

In college, I wasn't terribly active. I cheered one basketball season, but wasn't able to overcome my fear of my life literally being held in someone's hands. I played soccer for my sorority's intramural team. For one season. But I stayed more or less the same size. I was doing okay.

Then, senior year happened. I moved in with some "sisters" upstairs from some frat boys. And I drank. A lot. Nearly every weekend that fall. There were some issues out there, involving a young man (or two), that I didn't know how to maturely handle. So I partied instead. During the day, I was unhappy. And when I wasn't in class, I drove my little Tercel with the sunroof open. I drove up toward the mountains with the music blaring. Trying to get myself out of my head.

Needless to say, it didn't work.

I went on foreign study and met a great guy. He didn't drink. Instead, he treated his body as a temple, the way God intended it. He ate right and worked out. I started jogging and using the Nordic ski thingy at the PAC. Then we broke up, and it was back to business as usual. I still tried to run some, but my heart wasn't in it.

After graduation, I started dating the guy (man) whom I would eventually marry. He was in ROTC and was very fit. Still is. He loves to run. Runs every other day. Would probably do it every day if I'd let him. Anyhoo, I still had issues with weight. I put it on, and couldn't seem to keep it off. I used the gym membership that came with my first apartment.

Then we got married. I gained 10 pounds. My new husband could COOK! We bought a house, I gained more. We had a baby, then another two years later. The weight wouldn't leave. I tried joining a gym. I tried different kinds of diets. Nothing worked. Until something did.

A couple of years ago, I found a very low-carb diet. Coupled with the Zumba classes I loved, it did the trick. I lost 35 pounds! Then, we had another baby. Now, I'm losing and gaining the same 5 to 10 pounds over and over again. I'm trying to eat the right things. And I've started running again. Ick. I wish I could fit the Zumba back into life, but I don't have time to stand in lines. And my sweet hubby is rarely home in time for me to make it to a 6:00 class. (Excuses. Hear 'em?)

I also have issues with food. I eat, a lot. Sometimes, I don't know why I eat. It's not like I'm hungry all the time. I just get bored, or sad, or happy, or whatever. And I want to eat. Summer is the worst time for this. Especially when I'm home all day, in a house with three kids.

I'm working on it. Working it out, I guess. Running and fighting myself every day.

best kept secret - book review

I love to read. I believe that I have mentioned this before. I have been having a field day this summer, reading nearly every day. It's amazing what you can do when a baby is napping for 2 or 3 hours. Wow. If only I could keep the big two quiet as well! Clearly, that is wishful thinking.

I've been reading a book every couple of days, sometimes in a day. It just depends on how long D-man naps, or how long the book is, or how good the book is.

Yesterday, I read a book. The whole book. Granted, I did send the kids over to a friend's house to play and swim (even baby). So I had a little bit more quiet time than usual. But even after the kids got home, and I cooked dinner, and the kids were finally in bed, I read. I don't always do this. I like to watch a little TV, snuggle with my husband. Have some quiet and peace. Last night, I wanted to finish that book.

It's called best kept secret, written by Amy Hatvany. And it is spectacular! I have read a lot of books, not just this summer, but throughout my life. I have meet a few books that I am willing to part money for. Maybe more than a few, looking at the bookshelves in our house. But there are VERY few that I am willing to spend hardback money on. If I had not checked this book out from the library, I would have spent hardback money to get it. It is that good. I may still go and buy it, so that I can have my own copy to read whenever I want.

It is the story of Cadence, a freelance writer who was staying at home to raise her son. She is a heavy drinker, some would say (correctly) that she's an alcoholic. Her now ex-husband takes her son one day, and she is too drunk to do anything. She thought she'd been hiding it, that no one had noticed. Cadee is through rehab, is meeting with a counselor, in a group, and attending AA meetings. She is also fighting to get her son back. She is forced into self-examination and finding new friendships.

I am not like Cadee. At least, not on the surface. I am not divorced, a single mom, a writer (ha!), or an alcoholic. But I felt myself in her on nearly every page. I knew her struggles to keep her temper with her son (my sons). I know how hard it is to cope with the boundless energy of children while holding down a job and managing a house. I know how hard it is to feel people looking at you, judging you, while you stand there not being able to do anything. I know what it is to feel powerless to stop something over which you wish you had more control. I know how hard it is to open up and let other people into your life.

Cadence is every mom. I know moms who would deny it, and say that it's not that hard. I know there are moms who make it look easy on the outside. But we all have things we can't control. We all have addictions. We all have issues, we just don't show them all the time.

If you are a mom, or even if you're not, I would recommend reading this book.

By the way, another book I was willing to pay hardback for? Summer Sisters, by Judy Blume. It's not a kiddie book. But that's a whole other post. 

Free Writing

I went to a conference this week. I wasn't sure what to expect from the Education and Business Summit, since I'm not a business teacher. My step-mom was skeptical too, but I did manage to come away with some good ideas for things to do in my classroom.

One of my favorite sessions was "Which Disney Character Are You?". I am a Disney girl. I have been a fan since I was little. However, I'm not a big Princess person. Maybe I've always been a tomboy at heart. My favorite Disney character was, is, and shall always be Winnie the Pooh, or Pooh for short. He is a bear of "very little brain", but he has a heart that is larger than anyone else's. The presenter, Ms. Flowers, asked us to think about Disney characters and their leadership. She used examples (movie clips!!) from Toy Story (Woody), Up (Ellie), and Mulan (Mulan). We discussed their different leadership styles. I was really hoping for some kind of multiple-choice quiz, but was disappointed. Ah, well. We did get to watch movie clips, so that's a win in my book.

Another session that I really enjoyed was titled "Personal Narrative: Writing to Find a Career You Love". The presenter was again Ms. Flowers. And yes, I got her contact info, because she was GOOD! In this session, she gave us some information, and then gave us some instructions on how to do a free-write. It involved writing, without stopping, whatever came into our heads, whether it had to do with the topic or not. Not worrying about grammar, or punctuation, or spelling. What a great thing to tell students. We just want to get them writing.

At that point, she gave us a prompt and told us to write for ten minutes. My first thought was '10 minutes!? Is she crazy?' I couldn't imagine writing for that long, nonstop. The topic was "When I was six years old, I wanted to be..." I managed to write for the allotted ten minutes, without stopping. I wrote a whole page of notebook paper. I wished there had been more time, because the end kind of snuck up on me. Wow! Of course, my hand was terribly sore. It took several minutes for it to feel normal again. Then it was time for prompt #2: "Before I die, I really want to ..." If you'd like to see it, here you go:


Before I die, I really want to have one of those big anniversaries. I've been married for 12 years so far, which is not a terribly long time. I don't even mean 25 years, though that seems like a worthy goal. And that one isn't too far off, so it's too easy. I want to make it to 50, ideally to 75. I know that a lot of it has to do with how long I live, which I don't really know how long it will be. But my paternal grandparents celebrated their 50th Anniversary - silver - back in 1998. I remember  the big service in the church. My cousin Kelly gave a beautiful speech about how inspiration their marriage was to all 16 of us grand kids. There was a reception to celebrate afterwards. All of the family was there. Us from here in SC; my aunt and uncle from CO. It was a beautiful celebration. You could really tell that grandma & grandpa still loved each other. Not too long after that, Grandpa passed away. I will never forget the morning I got that call. Even though Grandma lived for several more years after that, it seemed like she was just doing time until she could join him.
My maternal grandparents celebrated their 50th too. What is it about that generation? Were they a special kind of people, or are we today missing something fundamental?


Anyway, I just wanted to share. I particularly liked this one, and again felt let down that the time had ended. I plan to keep editing that one, to make it something special. Wonder if I can come up with a topic to free write on with my students. For them six wasn't really that long ago, and they are too young to think about what to do before they die. Any suggestions? 

Thoughts on Reading

As I sit here on my bed, next to my oldest son who is reading Harry Potter: Order of the Phoenix, I am reminded again of how important reading is. I love books. Really. A lot. I am happiest when there is a book in my hands, and I am curled up in a chair (on a couch), perhaps with a blanket over my legs for comfort. I have always loved to read. My parents said that they started reading with me when I was a baby, and I was "reading" along with them before I'd started kindergarten. I remember walking up to the Square in Oxford, MS, when I was in elementary school, so I could go to Square Books and look. I'd beg/borrow money from my parents to buy new Babysitters Club or Sweet Valley High books.

I read for pleasure, to get out of my regular life. To be transported to other places where everything worked out in 150 pages or less. I knew it wasn't real, but it was still nice. It's not that home life was bad, except for my bratty little sister who followed me everywhere. My parents split up when I was 11, but Mom was still at our house every day getting us ready for school and meeting us when the bus dropped us off. But I still loved that escape.

In high school and college, I don't think I read as much. Who does? Who has time to read books just for fun? There is so much required reading. Those books that are assigned just didn't have the same pull for me as the ones I could CHOOSE to read. But I didn't do a lot of reading. Just the bare minimum to get by and get decent grades.

Now, I am back where I was when I was in elementary and middle school. Especially now, in the summer. On vacation. I go to the library at least once a week. I would just as soon sit all day and read. This wouldn't be a problem, except for the three little people who also live at my house. Those darn kids!

Hubs and I read to our oldest all the time when he was a baby. The large, 5-shelved bookshelf in the boys' room is testament to that. It's full of books, from first chapter books to Harry Potter. When boy #2 came along, we didn't have as much time to read. It was a lot different chasing after 2 boys. A lot of the time, I feel like I shortchanged #2 (B-rex) in the book department. I know all kids are supposed to be different. They are people, you know. But Cheese (the oldest) loves books like I do. He reads incessantly, working his way through any series he is interested in. (That he can get his hands on, he says.) But B-rex doesn't like to read. Is this my fault? Should I have taken more time to read to him, with him, when he was a baby? He's almost 8 now, is it too late?

With the youngest, D-man, I am making more of an effort. To read. One of his first words (sounds) was "boooo", meaning book. I know this, because he is usually holding a book out toward me when he makes the sound. I love that he loves books. He doesn't always sit still for a whole one, but he brings me one a lot. The same ones. Over and over. That's okay though, because it's just the beginning.

I'm passing on my love of books to my sons. I'm teaching them that it's possible to travel in your mind, if not with your body. I'm hoping they learn to look outside of themselves, to see the world in a slightly different way. That's the joy of books. 

Lemons

Okay, so I know that the cars were used when we bought them. I understand that they are not perfect and new. No problem. But I expect that they will last more than 4 months after buying. Such frustration!!

Weston couldn't get his car to start this morning. It was early, he was leaving for church. He said that it sometimes has trouble getting going when it's cold. No problem. So he took my car instead. At 9:30, I went out to try again, so the boys and I could go to Sunday School. Nothing. I went out again at 10:30. Nothing. So, no church for the 2nd week in a row.

Tomorrow, the plan is for us to get the kids up extra-early so that they can all drive me to work. Luckily, I don't have morning duty this week, so I don't have to be there until 7:20. BUT, I do have class tomorrow afternoon. Starting at 4:00. It is NOT at my school. Hmmm. What to do? Guess I'll hitch a ride or walk or something.

What could be wrong with the Santa Fe? I have no idea. I just hope it can be fixed. Soon. Cheaply. Otherwise, we are in trouble!

In other news, I really enjoyed the Phineas and Ferb marathon on ToonDisney. That is my new favorite show. Other than Grey's, House, Dancing with the Stars, Criminal Minds, and Numb3rs. But for a kids' show, P & F is really catchy. They had a marathon all weekend. So it's been on constantly! But I think I have now officially seen every single episode of it. I hope they make some new ones soon!

Those were the days

Oh for the days when B-rex would sleep late. I'm afraid we have him so conditioned to getting up early for school, that he now will wake up early on the weekends too! NOOOOOOOO! I loved that I could always count on B-rex to be a good LATE sleeper. Even as late as last weekend, he slept late. I was really looking forward to having some rest today. Oh well. Just more time to do the laundry.

Hubs and Cheese are still at the hospital. Cheese had his colostomy reversed and his colon reconnected to his rectum. Third time's the charm, right? I went to visit last night, and he seems okay so far. The doc said that his rectum was not quite as dialated as he had hoped, so they left some gauze in there to "stretch" things out. Hubs said that it would come out on Sunday. I'm not sure how that will work, but I'm not the doctor.

Cheese looked alright. Pretty good for someone who had major surgery 10 hours before. He had a dose of morphine while I was there, and that seemed to help. I know he is still in a bit of pain. Poor little guy. What a tough kid! Cheese is my hero!

The week at work was okay. I have had to contact 2 parents so far this year. One was early in the week, and the girl has been much better since then. Mom apparently threatened to take away her cell phone. Why an 8th grader needs a cell phone is beyond me! But I guess when you have as much money as this family, even the dog can have a cell phone.

Cheese also has a loose tooth. His first. The tooth fairy has been to the bank, or so I hear. I heard that she picked up some silver dollars and some gold dollars. Something special for when the tooth comes out. :-) I surveyed my students, and the going rate for a tooth is anywhere from $1 to $20! Wow! What would a tooth have to do to be worth $20? Some people just have more money than sense. Hubs and I decided that $1 is plenty for the fairy to leave. Especially since there's another brother on the horizon to losing teeth. We don't want her to set an expectation too high. Ya know?

Must. Go. Switch. Laundry.

need more hours and less shouting

So, the boys are in the other room. Playing some game that requires them to throw toys into a trash can. And then fight about whose turn it is. There is much shouting. And I'm pretty sure that Cheese is cheating. Or at least not taking turns properly. Because B-rex is yelling a lot. In anger and despair.

What a week! I should really be reading my JOhn Dewey book for class, but I just can't bring myself to pick it up. It's just so wicked boring! And I should also read chapter 4, but again: BORING. Ugh! Grad school is not fun. It is a lot of work.

On top of that, school started this week. Which is not too bad. I've got pretty good classes, it seems so far. It's hard to tell, since we only had 2 days. But they seem alright.

1st period: good. There are a few I'm going to have to come down hard on. Soon. But I can handle that.

2nd period: super! They have been great so far.

3rd period: OMG! Try 29 (yes, 29) sixth graders in one room. With only 27 desks. And I may end up with more, because of scheduling mix-ups. Oh, boy! I am not looking forward to this one!

4th period: 13. Because of the same scheduling probs, I only have 13 in this class. Seem wrong to anyone else? How important is it exactly that these kids all have lunch together? I mean, seriously! Wouldn't their parents rather them get a quality education?

5th period: awesome! Great kids. Mostly my 2nd period from last year.

6th period: is going to be tricky. I've got my "mean girls" from 1st per. last year. All in the same class again. How do they do that? Anyway, I need to figure out how to separate them again. So they will sit down and shut up!

And on top of all that, Cheese started kindergarten. I'll admit it. I cried. But just a little! Really! Not even enought to mess up my makeup. But it was hard. I can't even believe that he's that old. Where has all the time gone?

Well, that's my week. I could really use some motivation. Like the fact that the masters will bring in a LOT more money!!!!! Must read now. Must. Read. Now.

Ouch!

My throat hurts! B-rex has been back in daycare for a week now, and I think he brought home a little something to share with the family. His nose started running Friday night, and today my throat hurts. Cheese also has a runny nose.

I suppose I could have picked it up at work, but my students aren't back yet, so that seems more unlikely to me.

It has been a busy week for me. Getting ready for back-to-school is never easy. I had Latin meetings on Monday and Tuesday, then met again with the other myth teacher on Wednesday. Thursday and Friday were official school work days.

Friday we also had orientation for 6th graders. A time for them to pick up schedules, meet their teachers, try to figure out their lockers. Which evidently is much harder now than back in the day when I was in school. I don't remember having a hard time with my locker. Yours truly got to be one of the official greeters at the orientation. Yes, me! I am actually really good at fake smiling and being pleasant to people. It must be from all those church greetings! (I just knew that being a pastor's wife would come in handy one day!)

In other news, we are looking more closely at Cheese's last surgery! So close! He went to the doc on Friday and the prognosis looks good! Can you tell I'm excited!? Finally, he is going to be "normal" in the booty area. Please, God.

Hubs is sailing along. Still driving out to work every day. Wish we could find some way so that he doesn't have to drive so far, but right now I guess that's how it has to be. Either that, or I have to drive over an hour to work. And since we can't afford for me to quit, this is it!

Anyhoo, I'm going to find some drugs to help my throat. I hope this clears up by Thursday. I'll need my voice when the kiddos come back to school!

home again, home again

So, I've been home now for just over a week. Can I just say that there are not words to describe how I felt and continue to feel? When I walked down the escalator in the Charlotte airport, and saw Hubs, I just wanted to cry. I think I did actually cry a bit. Emotionally, it was overwhelming. Since then, we have been like newlyweds again. Mostly.

I saw the boys that evening, since they spent the day with their Nana. We went out to dinner with them and my sister's family. It was great! I got to have Mexican food and see my boys! I swear, both of them had grown like 2 feet! B-rex is talking much better. And Cheese! He can do math now! Not complex math, but still! I can't believe how smart he is.

Last Wednesday, I began working on my Masters degree. It's an accelerated program, only 15 months. So, if all goes as planned - and when does it ever? but I can hope - I will be finished at the end of next September. Wow! Fast track! It's exciting, but a little overwhelming as well. We have class one night a week and a study group one night a week. Each class is 6 weeks long. That's it. Crazy!

I go back to work on Monday. I have some Latin meetings early in the week, then all-school stuff at the end of the week. Fun, fun, fun! In fact, I really should be looking over the curriculum, but I don't have it here. It's at the parsonage, where we've been living for a week.

Okay, gotta go! I'll try to have more interesting things to update about. My life, as it is, is not very exciting. Sorry.

Craziness I tell you

I must have lost my mind. I actually volunteered to be the head Latin person for the district while T is on maternity leave next year. What was I thinking? That means that I'll be the go-to person for all 6 of the Latin teachers in the district. I'll be in charge of the paperwork, the meetings, the curriculum, the in-services, everything. Yikes! Well, it's only one year. Then T will be back. She'd better come back.

I leave for Italy in 6 days. Am I ready? Well, I thought so. It's the biggest trip yet, 30 people! 17 kids ranging in age from 9 to 14. 13 adults. (I'm counting Hubs as an adult, even though he won't admit to actually being one.) What am I thinking? I'm thinking that I love it over there. That it is worth any price just to see the land again. To feel the ruins under my hands. To smell the lush fields and taste that gelato. We're going to Venice this time. When I think about the last time I was there.... it was a different time. I was so young then. Only 21! There will be no wandering around the various bridges this time. It will only be a day. Wish we could stay there longer. And Verona. And Florence! Maybe we can take a look at those leather markets again. I need a new belt, since the ones I bought back in college will NOT fit me anymore. That was a while ago.

Anyway, just waiting now. Hubs is on his way home with his parents. They want to see the kids and take us all out to dinner. Sweet! I was looking forward to a simple pizza at home, but whatever. They're paying. I'm tired, as I often am when Hubs is gone. I can't sleep without him here. I think that I finally turned off the light last night around 1:15. And then got up at 6:00. I've averaged about 5 hours of sleep a night while he's been gone. And my nose is all stuffy. (by dose is all tuffy.) That's not exactly a recipe for a reunion: Hubs' parents, me tired, me not feel good. Should be a fun evening.

D's Wings, huh? Great. I hope the kids behave!

BTW, I will have use of the school laptop this summer. I hope to be able to update this blog on a regular basis. Well, not during the first trip, probably. Hubs won't let me, I'm sure. But during the long trip, when I'm on my own. I'll write it for him, and the kids. They can keep up with me while I'm gone. I'm a genius! After all, this blog IS called My Summer Vacation. It's almost 2 years old now. Who knew?

Late.

It is past my bedtime. I don't think I'll be sleeping any time soon. I've got a lot on my mind. I can't even really explain it. I don't know that I'm free to, since my mom reads this blog occasionally. I'm just tired and frustrated.

I hate teaching. Period. On some days, I don't even like the kids any more. They are so mean to each other. One girl, Madi, called some other girls in class "stupid" today. And they were her friends! A couple of other kids are so annoying, I could gladly take an axe to their heads, just to make them shut up. One is a 7th grader, so I have another year with him. The other is a 6th grader, and he says he's signed up for my class for next year. Which means 2 more years with him.

None of them think before they open their mouths. Ever. At least my 2 worst classes are in Washington this week. So I don't have to deal with them. They are all so whiny. At the slightest bit of work, they start to whine. I think they are smart. So why can't they understand that whining is not the way to go?

I'm tired of B-rex saying "NO!" everything. That is his favorite word these days. We've tried Bonnie's idea of just giving him choices for everything, thereby taking away 'no' as an answer, but even that doesn't always work. Tonight, he threw a fit because he didn't want to brush his teeth before bed. Then, when Hubs closed his door, B-rex decided that he DID indeed want to brush his teeth. Only, Daddy had already taken that choice off the table. So he just had to go straight to bed instead.

I feel like I just want to curl up in bed and sleep for a week. I have had it with people.

So Far, So Good

We are now 4 days into the new year, and things are going okay. There have not been any MAJOR issues yet. Just one, small, teensy-weensy problem. My car.

I went to go start the car before leaving for work yesterday because it was freakishly cold, like near freezing. Which for SC is very cold. (I know this is not a good idea. Evidently there have been a few break-ins when people have left their cars outside warming up. Although can you really call it a break-in when you leave the door unlocked?) I put the key in the ignition and turned. It made some strange whirring/grinding sound (if you call, I'll do it for you) and the inside lights came on. But it did not start. I tried again. Same thing. So I ran back into the house to get Hubs opinion. We decided that I should take his car. And I did.

So I get to school, 10 minutes after I was supposed to be there for morning duty in the gym. I served my time in the gym babysitting the sixth graders. Went back to my classroom. The phone rings. It's Hubs. "My keys to your car are in my car." So, since I had MY keys on my keychain, he had no keys. And the first bell would ring in just 10 minutes. Not enough time for me to get home and back. So Hubs stayed home with the kiddies yesterday. Cheese did not go back to school. B-rex did not start his new daycare. Oops. But really, who keeps a set of car keys in a car?! Even if it is a different car?

Of course, when Hubs tested the car when I arrived home after school, it worked fine. Damn thing.

And then AGAIN this morning, it wouldn't start. So I took Hubs' car again. Only this time, I left him my keys. But he called at 8:00 to let me know that HE couldn't get it to start either. And I have no jumper cables in my car. We have some, apparently, but they are guess where? In HIS CAR! Sigh. So a friend came by and took Cheese to preschool, since she works there. Thank God for Sharon. And Hubs called his buddy Fred to come help. Only Fred's wife had run over his jumper cables and smushed one end. So he had to go buy a new set. And us a set. THEN he jumped the car and all was well. This was around 8:45-ish. Hubs finally got to work a little after nine. Then had to leave early to go over to the Seminary to talk to them about his readmission for the fall.

Anyway, that's our drama. We're looking into getting a new car for me. Since mine doesn't want to get up early anymore. Hubs bought it a new battery and got its oil changed, but I don't think that will work in the long run. It is older than most of my students. We're looking at the dreaded mini-van. I've wanted one ever since I found out I was pregnant with Cheese. We've held off for a while, but I think it is just a matter of time. Oh, and money. I don't know HOW we would pay for that. We've never had a car payment before. I'm trying not to think about that though, even though it is the most important part. I suppose we'd find it somewhere. Like the kids' college fund. Such as it is.

Like I said, so far not so bad. If the broken car is the worst of it, it is going to be a GREAT year!

B-rex did start his new daycare today. Ms. Amy said that he had a great day! He just jumped right in like he'd been there forever! I am so glad that he is so adaptable. He didn't even notice when I came in to pick him up. He was like "hi mommy" and kept on playing. After a moment, he did run over to me, but obviously he was having a good time. I'm glad. I wish we'd never taken him out of that daycare to begin with. His home daycare was nice, but he just really needs to be with more kids his own age. I think this is going to be so good for him!

Turkey gone, gone

Another happy holiday over and done. I cannot believe it is almost Christmas.

We went to the in-laws yesterday for food and fun. I actually contributed this year. Made a right lovely bread casserole thing. It was yummy! So moist and flavorful. I liked it. A Weight Watchers recipe no less! I think we will see that one again before next Thanksgiving.

The food was yummy. The turkey was moist this year. Cheese actually ate all his food! B-rex ate most of his. Well, all his turkey and gravy. No green beans or rice. Whatever. He barely eats most days anyway. Hubs took the boys for a walk along the creek that runs behind his parents house. He confided in me on the way home: It used to look much bigger. I just laughed. I'm sure the boys thought it was a big adventure, traipsing along in the "woods" behind the house. And they were spending quality time with their daddy. That's the most important part. They'll always remember that.

Now the Christmas fun begins. I've already ordered some movies as gifts for the boys. Power Rangers. Fun for them, not so much for Mom and Dad. Ordered some DVDs for my bro too. That reminds me, he suggested that I check their registry to see what was left. I don't know what to get his new wife. She can be difficult to buy for sometimes. I hope my dad and GiGi send their lists soon. I hope we get that bonus check soon too, so I can pay for all this stuff!

Hope all had a happy Thanksgiving!

Happy Halloween

Tomorrow is Halloween. The boys are looking forward to going to Princess' house and trick-or-treating. I had to explain how the whole day would go down. Because Cheese is all into details and asking "Is that after today?" about everything. "First we go to school. Then I pick you up, then we come home and get Bennett. Then we order the pizza. Then we go to pick up the pizza and take it to Princess' house. Then we eat the pizza. Then we change into your costumes. Then we go trick-or-treating with Princess. Then you can hand out candy at Princess' house for a little while. Then we are coming home and going to bed."

at least, that's the plan. I'm sure a thing or twenty will totally ruin that. Already we've hit a snag. The new Power Ranger costume that Cheese bought with his birthday money is messed up. We had a Fall Festival at our church on Sunday. The boys had nametags on with the type of "Christian character" their costume showed. And Cheese didn't take the sticker off when he took off his costume. And I didn't notice it when I threw it in the washer. So the sticker got washed. And, like a bad mommy, I dried it. Then I noticed the sticker residue. So I washed it again. And it is still there. I don't know what to do.

Cheese does have other costumes. Like the SpiderMan one from last year that still fits because he has not gained an OUNCE since then. Or the Ninja Turtle one that my mom got him. Or the Buzz Lightyear that we got from some friends. But I think his little heart is set on being the grey Power Ranger. Sigh. Maybe I should call my stepmom, knower of all things domestic.

Not much else going on. Hubs started a new job at BCBS this week. He's working customer service through a temp agency. Pay is good. Hours are steady. This week, he's also working every night at the bookstore. Oh, my. Can we say lack of sleep? And crabby? But at least he can come home for dinner in between!

Everyone says it's about time he picked up the slack. That this is just fair for what I've had to put in as far as work this past year. But I don't know. I liked working. I hated not seeing the kids for a couple of days at a time, but I liked what I was doing. Yes, it was stressful with the lack of money and such. But God will always provide, and did always provide.

I guess I'm trying to say that I'm sorry this is happening to him. The whole "burning the candle at both ends" thing. I've been there. I know it's not fun. I wish it didn't have to be this way. He'll miss the kids trick-or-treating again this year. I don't think he's been with us the past 2 or 3 years. Oh, well. Maybe next year.

Happy Halloween everyone!

Sick and Tired

Oh, yeah. B-rex came home from the in-laws last week with a cold. We medicated his little butt right up, the FDA be damned. But he still wanted to share, and share he has with his mommy. It hit Sunday afternoon with sniffles. Then Monday, all day, chills and stuffiness. Today, it was coughing and a monster headache. Three Tylenol later, here I am. At least it wasn't as bad as that migraine last spring that knocked me out!

The last couple weeks have been pretty eventful. Cheese had his colostomy reversed and was in the hospital for almost a week. He and I took a week to play hookey last week and recuperate. It was such fun! He is really a cool little guy for a 5-year-old. We went out to lunch a couple of times, and went to the grocery store, and kid-shopping. What great times! I hope he always remembers how much fun Mom is, even when he hates me as a teenager.

B-rex and I spent the week before together. Hubs had gone with Cheese to the hospital. So I went to work every day, then B-rex and I would hang out in the evenings. It was also pretty awesome! We got to read books, watch movies, just have some one-on-one time. Second children don't get as much of that, so I'm so thankful that I got to spend some time with him. Sweet! Then last week, he went to stay with the in-laws, so as not to try and play rough with his big brother. He came home on Wednesday, had his THIRD birthday on Thursday, then started speech on Friday. What a week!

Hubs went to MUSC with Cheese, then came home for a night, then went to Duke for Pastor's school. He came home on Wednesday, but went right back to work on Thursday. No vacation and spending quality time for us. Oh, well. He went back to his counselor today, who has declared that his counselling sessions are done. He's all better! Or, at least he is able to function well with his meds. He doesn't have to go back unless he has a relapse. He's been doing pretty well lately, though. I hope this is behind us for now. I guess the real test will be when he goes back to school next fall. But we'll cross that bridge later.

Hmm... I guess that's about it. Other than being sick, I'm doing fine. Tired, as always. I'm trying to get caught up with grading all the papers from last week. I love being home with my boys, but I hate all the paperwork I have to leave for my cherubs so they'll stay mostly out of trouble. Grades are due on Friday, and I have a TON of stuff left to do. Oh, well. I finished all I wanted to tonight, so that's good. I can concentrate on other stuff tomorrow.

If At First You Don't...

Can you tell my Hubs is out of town? I haven't posted this much since, well, never. Guess I am trying to make up for lost time. And Gigi telling me that I write well isn't hurting either. If she is reading this to get updates on the kiddies, guess I should oblige and actually write about the little buggers.

Today was like a long comedy of errors. Shannon said last night that they would be done at her mom's house "early." That, to me, meant before the 9:00 hour. I just assume that everyone's kids get up at the butt crack of dawn like mine do. So I got up early-ish (7:00), and did a little TaeBo. I hurted. Cheeseman got up while I was doing that. He wanted to know if it was time to go to Shalee's yet.

It got to be 9:00, and I still hadn't heard from Shannon, so I decided to shower. Yes, I'd been all stinky and sweaty until then. But the kids don't mind, and Hubs isn't here to have an opinion. I showered, got dressed. Still nothing. Finally, 10:20 rolls around and she calls. I head over with the boys, and drop them off. I'm going to get my nails done.

I can't help it. I'm addicted now. I love the way they look. I love the deep pink color of my toes. It's bootiful! So I sit. And sit. And sit. And it's now almost noon! Finally, the guy that does the best foot/leg massages during pedicures is free! He does the pedi, then the mani. I go with some color on the mani this time. Branching out, ya know! I glance at the clock, and it is 1:20. Which would not be a problem, except that the kids are swimming (without their momma!) and Bman has his speech therapy at 1:45. Crap.

I walk out the door of the salon at 1:32. I am at the pool at 1:45. Double crap. Bman does NOT want to get out of the pool. I finally promise him that we'll be back when Miss Jill is done. Then we hurry home. We pull into the driveway at 1:55. She is not there. I rush into the house, leaving Bman in the car (with the windows DOWN!), and call her cell. She agrees to come back for a shortened session.

At 3:00, we are walking back out the door to go back to the pool. We get there, and Bman wants to jump straight in. We get his Spiderman floaties on, and we're ready to rock. Cheeseman is hanging out IN THE BIG POOL! Dog paddling like a maniac! Yaay! About 20 minutes later, his bag has lost all its adhesive powers, and Cheeseman has to get out of the pool lest he contaminate it with his poop. The joys of a colostomy bag. :-( He's okay though. He knows it's nothing personal.

We left around 3:50, right as they were blowing the whistle for adult swim. Do all pools with lifeguards do that? Just curious. My pool experiences are limited recently. We used to go almost every day when I was in junior high. Mom was a student at Ole Miss, so we'd go to the "family pool" on campus all the time. It was AWESOME! I had the hugest crushes on the lifeguards there. They were HOT! I used to have pictures of some of them. Wonder what ever happened to those?

Anyway, I gave the kids a snack when we got home. Cheeseman was all excited because they were having movie night at NEUMC (our old church). He and Bman love movie night. They get to wear their pj's and lay in sleeping bags on the floor of the sanctuary. Alas, 'twas not to be. Cheeseman passed out on the couch. One minute, he was awake. The next, he was sawing logs. I tried to wake him at quarter to six, but he wasn't moving. I did move him into his bed, just in case. Bman and I played and read books for another hour, till it was bath time.

Cheeseman woke up just after 7:00. Bman got out of the tub, Cheeseman got in. I had bought these little soap tablets that turn the water colors. Bman got yellow, cuz he likes to pee in the tub. Cheeseman chose red. Because his favorite Power Ranger is the red ranger. Sigh. Anyway. Cheese was all upset because he missed movie night at church. So we had our own movie night at home. We (well, the boys) watched their new TMNT video for almost an hour. Then I had to call it a night. There were talking samurai rabbits and pandas. It was too much for me. Though I have no problem with talking ninja turtles. A strange fact that Cheese pointed out to me. The wisdom of a 4-year-old.

So now, I'm hanging out. I'm trying to decide whether I want to wake the boys up early tomorrow. I have an all associate meeting at BAM at 7:00 AM. My manager would like me to be there, even said I could bring the boys to enjoy the free donuts. But I don't know how sociable they'll be that early. I'm not usually too sociable that early. And I'd have to wake them up. And they can be cranky. But we're talking about the big Harry Potter shindig. Which I'm not actually working at. Tough decision. I'll make it when the alarm goes off at 6:21.

Gigi, if you're reading this, hope you have enjoyed the week of play-by-play action around our house. It will likely not continue. Hubs comes home next week, and he doesn't like it when I hole myself up in the room and write. Nevermind that it makes me feel better, but whatever. Also, I'll be working at BAM every day except Thursday. So I won't even know what the boys are doing. I know that Monday, Cheese has another booty procedure. Then Bman has speech therapy on Tuesday. Thursday, we're going swimming with Nikki and Madison. But other than that, who knows?

By the way, if you have a chance, check out the devotional for July 12 of Streams in the Desert by Cowman. It is a fabulous message!

I get a title today!

And nothing fancy to title it. Just another regular day in the neighborhood. Except that my gel nail came off my pointer finger on my left hand. Damn! Now I really need to find someone to watch the boys tomorrow so that I can go get my nails done. Otherwise, they will all have to come off again. Such a pain.

Today was just a long day at work. Nothing exciting. I saw one of my students. It rained really, really hard. I got a bday present from one of my managers, Mandy. She is super nice! It is a 2008 box calender, with full color photos of Italy! My favorite place! Where I am going again next summer! I am excited! Anyway, there was also a card, signed by a bunch of the people I work with. It played music - YMCA! Hmmm... need to get that one for my iPod.

By the way, thanks Bro! I have already spent all but 25 cents of the $25 iTunes gift card you sent. I love music, what can I say!? It was lots of 80s tunes. Wish I could find Def Leppard's "Pour Some Sugar On Me." I would LOVE to have that one for my iPod.

Had dinner at Mom and Jane's again. What am I going to do tomorrow? Guess the boys and I will have to scrounge together a meal. They only eat chicken fingers and hot dogs, though. Yuck. Maybe some mac'n'cheese. If I can get Bman to sit still long enough to eat! I'd like to try some new WW recipes, but I don't know that the kids will eat them. Maybe just enough for me.

Going to do Beth Moore Bible study now. Jesus, the One and Only. Ain't it the truth?

Still no way to write a title. This is annoying me, even though the title of a post was often the hardest part for me. It's like naming a story. You have to capture the essence in just a few words. How do authors do that? I am continually amazed at that at work. They must be very creative people.

Today was a long day. I worked at BAM all day. My feet hurt. I really wish Hubs were home so that he could rub them. My feet!!!

Where were the boys? Bman went to daycare. We haven't used it in a few weeks. We're only paying half each week, to hold his spot. But we were desperate and Jane can only handle one of the boys at a time. Evidently, they can be overwhelming. So Cheeseman went to Nanas house. First, though, they went to a free movie with Aunt Nikki and Madison. They saw Everybody's Hero. He said it was good. I asked what it was about. "Baseball" that's all he remembers. Oh, to have the ability to be so concise.

A cute thing Cheeseman keeps doing: "Are you my conscience?" I don't know where he got that from. I know Pinnochio asks Jiminy Cricket that in Pinnochio, but I don't think the boys have seen that movie. If they did, it wasn't at our house. For all the Disney movies we have, we don't have that one. (hint, hint. I'd like it!) Anyway, Hubs and I have tried to explain that God is his conscience, but he does not seem to care. I think he just likes asking.

Another thing he does, which can get annoying at times, is ask "what's after bedtime?" Then, "what's after waking up time?" and further "what's after breakfast?" and on and on and on. Until you're at the next day and making up what's next. My word! That boy loves to hear himself speak!

Bman is also loquacious (look at my big word). The problem is, you can only understand about half of what he says. Power Ranger becomes "pow jane ger." It's an issue. So this Friday, we are starting speech therapy. ONE HOUR EVERY WEEK. Um, I don't know what kind of crazy that woman is, but Bman is NOT going to sit and work with her for an hour. Never gonna happen. That boy can't even sit still for a 20 minute cartoon! It's worth a shot though. The therapist, Jill, said that his main problem is enunciation. Sigh. I thought my kids were going to be perfect.

In other, unrelated, slightly strange, news, I got a random email today. From an old boyfriend. That I was engaged to. On my work email, of all places. Just a note to wish me a happy birthday. It was odd. I wrote back thanks, and the family is all fine. It was just so out of the blue. I haven't seen him, even in passing, in over two years. I run into his mom occasionally, because she works in the same school district as I do. Last I heard, he was married with a couple of kids. Dunno. It was nice of him to write though. I can't believe he remembered my birthday. I have NO IDEA when his is. Early in the year maybe?

I've been reading this devotional, Streams in the Desert. It is great! Today's entry really spoke to me:
No prayer is ever lost, or any prayer ever breathed in vain. There is no such thing as prayer unanswered or unnoticed by God, and some things we see as refusals or denials are simply delays. Christ sometimes delays His help so He may test our faith and energize our prayers. Our boat may be tossed by the waves while He continues to sleep, but He will awake before it sinks. He sleeps but He never oversleeps, for He is never too late.

Chew on that. I know, personally, there have been many times I've wondered if God was listening. Mostly when Cheeseman was so sick and in the hospital. Why couldn't he get well? Or when Hubs was struggling so hard with school. Why couldn't he do better? I know in my head that God is hearing me, and that He will do what is best according to His will. I just need to keep on praying, because God is hearing me and doing His thing.

"And I tell you, ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks, receives, and the one who seeks finds, and to the one who knocks it will be opened...If you, then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will the heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him!" Luke 11: 9-11, 13

A Whole Year

I just realized that I have been doing this for a whole year. I have kept up a hobby for more than a few months. And Hubs said I have a short attention span. This from the poster child for ADHD. Geez! I am so excited! A whole year! Amazing!

Happy 18th Anniversary to Dad and Glenna!

Anyway, this was not a good day for me. The beginning showed some promise. Cheeseman got up early but Hubs took him and Bman out to the living room to play. I got to sleep in about another hour. Yay! Had some fruit for breakfast. Then Hubs left for church, and I finished getting the boys ready.

We walked over a little before Sunday school time. The boys played in the nursery until Cheeseman's teacher got there. Still, no problems. Bman stayed in the nursery, playing with all the little cars and such. He was having a great time with the tractor.

Then we went upstairs to the sanctuary for the worship service. And it all fell apart. Suddenly, Cheeseman and Bman were devil children. They would not sit still. They colored on my nice, white pants. (I know, what was I thinking?) Bman started running up and down the middle aisle! During the opening prayer! I was mortified! As soon as Hubs finished with the children's moments, I took them both out. Back to the nursery.

That lasted about 15 minutes. Then they started fighting over the plastic slide. It was awful. They were yelling, and it was hurting my ears. So I walked them back home. Of course, then they just kept on. And they found their little plastic guns, so they started shooting each other too.

I was livid! We only have communion once a month at PUMC, and this was the week. So I missed it. I missed Hubs' sermon again. I missed singing. I missed the whole dang service! And I actually look forward to it every week! I have just begun being a Pastor's wife, so I have not yet learned to hate it. Not that I would, but I really like going to church. I hope this is not going to be a weekly thing. And the problem is, my two are the youngest in the whole church. There is no one in the nursery to staff it during worship. No one else needs it. Just me. And I have no help, because Hubs is up front leading the service! Argh!!! I thought the crayons and coloring books would help! What do I do??????

Anyway, the boys beat each other up most of the afternoon, until Bman passed out from exhaustion during the reading of Jonah. Hubs was also taking a nap. Then finally Cheeseman fell asleep, but not until AFTER his colostomy bag leaked and I had to change it. Again.

What a day!

Oh, and did I mention that we ate at Mom and Jane's tonight? I had 2 helpings of spaghetti. 2 pieces of cheesy bread. AND ice cream with chocolate syrup. It would not have been so bad if we hadn't eaten at McDonald's last night. I am out of flex points for the week already! And last week I put on 4 pounds while at Disney. I am feeling really dejected right now.

OOPS

I may have neglected to mention that Sunday was also our anniversary. Our seventh anniversary. Yay!

We didn't do anything special. In fact, we didn't do anything at all together except attend church. When we got home, Hubs ate lunch then fell asleep due to not getting home from the Braves game until nearly 3 a.m. He napped for about 3 hours, then got up in time to play with the boys for a little bit until it was time for youth group. When he got home, it was time to put the boys to bed. Then we sat and watched TV for a while, then both fell asleep on the couch.

Oh, the excitement!

So! I decided we needed to celebrate. After all, seven years is a big deal to me! I arranged for a babysitter. I picked her up on my way home from the bookstore on Monday. We also picked up a pizza. The sitter and I walked in the door, and Hubs' jaw dropped! I told him that we (he and I) were going out! So I took him out to Carraba's for dinner.

(We are really, really broke. But I had found 2 gift cards from students that totalled about $35. I figured we could both eat on that. And if were not for the beer and wine, we would have.)

It was nice. We got to really talk at dinner, instead of just trying to convince two little boys to eat. Instead of playing "blast off" and "airplane" and "train" with forks in order to bribe them to eat. Instead of picking food up off the floor. Instead of washing dishes.

Grown up conversation. We talked about how his first counselling session went. It was good. He has a second one next Tuesday. And today we got a letter from the insurance saying that they would cover his doctor visits! YES! I was a little concerned about that. Like I said, we are BROKE.

Anyway, it was a lovely evening. We still are not back where we were before all the breaking news, but we are at least sitting at the same table. It is going to take some time before I am able to trust him completely again. That's okay. The things we work for are the things that mean the most to us, right?

And tomorrow, BabyNet is coming to talk to us about our goals for Bman's speech therapy. At 8:30 a.m.!!! Um, I'd like for people outside of Hubs and me to be able to understand him. Duh!